diff --git a/README.md b/README.md
index 88bbc89..a99705b 100644
--- a/README.md
+++ b/README.md
@@ -1,75 +1,43 @@
-# Snipt
+# Snipt Glitch Edition
 
-## Running locally
+In Which, Somehow, A Centralized, Highly Connected Service Is Turned Into A
+Decentralized And Open One
+
+## Environment Variables
+
+- `DISABLE_SIGNUP` if set to `true` will disable account registration.
+
+This list is *incomplete*. You can help b%Yｷ%&%%%b%$ｷ"H%&%%%Y%&%%%%%%%?%&%%%%%%
+
+## Dependencies
+
+Make sure you have PostgreSQL installed and running beforehand. (If you don't
+know how to run it, you probably want the `systemctl` service.)
+
+## Installation
+
+The following text should be replaced:
+
+- `CURRENT_USER` with the current user.
+- `EDITOR` with your editor of choice.
+- `PORT` with the port to run the service on. This will default to 8000.
+
+Instructions:
 
 - Clone the repo.
 - `cd snipt`
-- `python3 -m venv ~/.virtualenvs/snipt`
-- `source ~/.virtualenvs/snipt/bin/activate`
+- `python3 -m venv envs/snipt`
+- `bash`
+- `source envs/snipt/bin/activate`
 - `pip install -r requirements.txt`
-- `brew install postgresql`
-- `brew services start postgresql`
-- `createuser snipt`
-- `createdb snipt --owner=snipt`
-- `cp settings_local.py-template settings_local.py` // modify if necessary
-- `make run`
+  (this will emit some errors, don't worry, they're fine)
+- `createuser CURRENT_USER`
+- `createdb snipt --owner=CURRENT_USER`
+- `cp settings_local.py-template settings_local.py`
+- `EDITOR settings_local.py`
+- `./resources.sh`
+- `python manage.py runserver 0.0.0.0:PORT`
 
-## Deploying on Dokku
+ENCODING U ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;ｬｦ%娃ﾂｬｸｦ｣ｩｬｸｦ､ｬｧｬｷ%Y｡､ｬｸｦ｣%bｬｶ｡､"Hｬｸｦ､%Yｬｸｦ､ｬｧｬｦ;,
 
-- `dokku apps:create snipt`
-- `dokku postgres:create snipt`
-- `dokku postgres:link snipt snipt`
-- `scp snipt.dump nsergeant@server.nicksergeant.com:/home/nsergeant`
-- `dokku postgres:connect snipt < snipt.dump`
-- `dokku domains:add snipt snipt.net`
-- `dokku storage:mount snipt /var/lib/dokku/data/storage/snipt-whoosh:/app/snipt-whoosh`
-- `dokku config:set DOKKU_LETSENCRYPT_EMAIL=support@snipt.net SECRET_KEY=<some-secret-key> USE_SSL=true WHOOSH_PATH=/app/snipt-whoosh/whoosh_index`
-- `git remote add dokku dokku@server.nicksergeant.com:snipt`
-- `git push dokku`
-
-## Automatic deploy to Heroku
-
-You can click the button below to automatically deploy Snipt to Heroku.
-
-[![Deploy](https://www.herokucdn.com/deploy/button.svg)](https://heroku.com/deploy?template=https://github.com/nicksergeant/snipt)
-
-## Manual deploy to Heroku
-
-- Clone the repo.
-- `heroku create`
-- `heroku addons:add heroku-postgresql:hobby-dev`
-- `heroku addons:add searchbox`
-- `heroku config:add SECRET_KEY=<some-secret-key>`
-- `git push heroku`
-- `heroku run python manage.py migrate`
-- `heroku run python manage.py createsuperuser`
-- Visit yourapp.herokuapp.com and login with the user you just created.
-
-## Updating your Heroku instance after an automatic deploy
-
-- `git clone https://github.com/nicksergeant/snipt`
-- `cd snipt`
-- `git checkout heroku`
-- `heroku git:remote -a <your-instance-name>`
-- `git push heroku heroku:master`
-
-## Options
-
-If you want email support (for password resets, server errors, etc):
-
-- `heroku addons:create postmark:10k`
-- `heroku run addons:open postmark` -> use an email you control and confirm it
-- `heroku config:add POSTMARK_EMAIL=<email_from_above>`
-
-If you want to disable user-facing signup:
-
-- `heroku config:set DISABLE_SIGNUP=true`
-
-If you want to enable Django's DEBUG mode:
-
-- `heroku config:add DEBUG=true`
-
-If you want to enable SSL on a custom domain after you've configured your
-Heroku SSL cert:
-
-- `heroku config:add USE_SSL=true`
+] REPEAT
diff --git a/resources.sh b/resources.sh
old mode 100644
new mode 100755